QUARANTINE NON-ROUTINE
/It’s spring 2020 and It’s a weird time to be alive.
Nothing is normal.
Nearly everything has changed.
There is so much loss.
And yet - we continue on.
I wanted to write about what our days look like right now, mostly for me to look back on and remember this strange time, and also to share our experience since no two families are exactly alike and everyone is handling this in their own way. While we don’t follow a strict schedule, there are some things we do every day and our days have a somewhat regular rhythm to them. I cannot follow a printed schedule to save my life, so we just take each day as it comes and pivot when we need to.
WHAT OUR DAYS LOOK LIKE
I workout every single day. I did this before quarantine as well, but in times of crisis I find it paramount to my emotional well being. I either do a 20 minute dance workout or a two mile run with the kids, sometimes with the double stroller, or sometimes with Trey biking next to me (which is definitely more stressful for me but more fun for him). On Friday mornings I teach a dance workout to a group of friends via Zoom, which has been super fun. Before quarantine, I would get my workout in sometimes early before Daniel left for work, or during Blaire’s morning nap. Now, the timing depends on when I’m seeing families and when Daniel has a work call, but at some point every single morning, I sweat for 20 minutes. It is good for my soul.
I am still the primary parent during this time, as Daniel worked full-time before restrictions and I worked part-time, so I have the kids the majority of the day. I am a pediatric speech therapist, and while an essential service, thankfully right now we can see families via telehealth. Our two young kids are also home with us full-time right now, so we juggle child care and our jobs, but we’ve managed to somehow make it work. It sounds so crazy when I type all that out, providing 24/7 childcare for two humans and both of us working from home, like how is that even humanly possible? But somehow we are doing it.
Blaire takes a morning nap and sometimes an afternoon nap. Trey and I get a lot of play time. If it’s nice, we’re outside in the backyard on the playset or the trampoline (direct quote from Daniel today: “The trampoline is saving my sanity.” It’s true.) when it’s raining we’re inside baking, doing crafts, and playing games. When it’s sunny in the late afternoons we get outside for a neighborhood walk or a bike ride.
One of the greatest benefits is our kids aren’t school age yet so I don’t have to follow a curriculum or intentionally home school (I bow to the moms of older children who are). Trey is 3. His work right now is play. What he needs from me right now is connection and moments of quality time. We highly value education, and we also know so much is learned outside the classroom. I know some moms are trying to relearn and teach fractions or long division or keep up with their child’s zoom meetings, and I am so impressed. If that is you, remember that this really is crisis schooling, not regular home schooling, and that you’re wearing all these new hats and even though they may not fit quite right, you’re really doing such a great job. No one has parented in a pandemic before, and this is new territory for all of us. The greatest lessons I am learning right now and that I can model include self-care, resilience in a time of crisis, flexibility, and empathy, and those to me are parenting gold.
I like to grocery shop so I still do it, but for the first month or so it was delegated to Daniel. I usually go on Mondays, either to Costco or Trader Joe’s, and stock us up for the week. It’s different now in that we wear masks, we wait in line, the stores are quiet and we don’t bring the kids or our bags. I was on a major baking kick and at one point was baking something every day, but as the weather has turned to spring we’re spending all our time out in the sun. When we shop, we don’t hoard or stock pile and I’ve never felt deprived. Things are often out, yes, but we are finding we can do without or create a replacement. I am still doing the meal planning (we rotate the same 5-10 and it’s the simplest and the greatest), and I am usually on dinner and Daniel does the dishes.
So we juggle the kids and work calls and zoom meetings and snacks and trampoline time and bike rides and all the messes and we’re doing it. And yes it’s a logistical shuffle, but overall, I’m liking it. I have to acknowledge that we are insanely lucky in that we both still have ours jobs that we can do remotely, we’re all healthy, and our biggest problem is scheduling work and childcare between us. I know it could be much, much worse, and we’ve had seasons that were much harder. Bed rest with my last pregnancy just about did me in. But this? I can do.
It’s an adjustment sure, and there are still tantrums and balancing acts and rough-around-the-edges parts and we could really use some help with all we’re juggling, but there is also time together that we wouldn’t get otherwise, cleared calendars, literal and figurative breaths of fresh air. Our days are just us, and our family life is richer and better for it. We’re finding out two truths: we already have everything we need, and somehow, we’re going to make it through this. Sending you all the hope and encouragement as you navigate your own new normal.